"Mom! You can't just take care of 2 kids by yourself! You can just take care of one, and that's me. Let dad take Macy." -Caitlin, 5 years old.

NICKNAMES


Macy has several nicknames:

• Macer
  
• Speed Macer
  
• Macy J
  
• Mace

However, sometimes a nickname pertains to actions or mannerisms of the individual. If this was the case, Macy's nickname should have something to do with a chair. This girl loves chairs. She sees a chair, she's got to sit in it. At 6:45am at the waiting room in the hospital Wednesday, while Macy was being prepped for tubes, all she wanted to do was to sit in every chair in the room - the leather recliner, the rock hard rocking chair, and the soft lazyboy. At home, she has taken over Caitlin's soft cushiony Cinderella chair (to which Caitlin said, "Mom, she can just have that chair. She loves it more than me."), Caitlin's personalized rocking chair, the rocking chair Grandpa Cecil gave us, and the 2 chairs that are painted to match the play table (that were also Caitlin's that we just went ahead and moved to Macy's room). Chairs are Macy's base when we chase her, they are her place she sits and eats her cookie or apples, and where she sits to play her stand up game. She even tips her Cinderella chair back and forth until she falls backwards and lays there hollering until someone picks her up only to start the process over again. This week she has been standing on the chairs and then shouting, "Bah!" as if to say, "Look, guys! Look! No hands!" Proud as we may want to be, our mortification sets in as we rescue her immediately. She finds it hilarious. Hilarious, indeed...

Rings, please!!!

We spent most of the day outside today starting at 7:30am. We went out in our jammies and chased each other up the walk and played with sidewalk chalk. It was one of those days that started nice and even though the wind was blowing too fierce for bubbles (we tried, though, quite a few times), you couldn't help but be outside. Caitlin even met a couple new friends who's grandparents live behind our house. Jon grilled for lunch and we caught scores of basketball games in between car washes and swingset trips. It was during one of these swingset trips that Macy reached for the rings...

Macy reached over and over for those rings and so I decided to let go to see what she did...and she held on! I was shocked. I let go a few more times to make sure she really wanted to do that, and then I sent Jon for the camera. The little things make us so proud.

I'm 5 now, you know!



Caitlin reminds me that she is 5...often. She reminds me of things she can do and decide.

• She pours her own milk in her cereal while dad's still sleeping (Jon told me that she announced to him that she had 4 bowls of cereal that morning and she had poured her own milk...sweet)


• She can get her sister out of her crib if we're busy (I laughed at this and said, ok, fully thinking that this was impossible...until she walked out one day with Macy. I will NEVER know how she lifted Macy out of that crib that is taller than her by at least 5 inches, nor do I want to know).


• She informed me who in our family is skinny and who is "bloat" (that is the nice way to say fat...hmmmm)


• She is getting an attitude...current attitudinal words include, "So," "I don't have to," "Whatever," and "Why do YOU get to stay up late and I don't?" A couple of these words and phrases have been banned from using, no matter who of her friends says them!


• She is still such a great kid. She helps out with her sister CONSTANTLY. She likes to clean - dusting is her favorite. She is a pleaser, for sure. In soccer in the fall, when her dad was the coach, she would kick the ball and instinctively look up at her dad for approval. She is sensitive. If sent to her room, she instantly tears up and is truly sorry for "whatever" she did. She is very upset when she thinks mom or dad are mad at her and cries uncontrollably if she gets too rough with Macy and Macy gets hurt.


• She loves her cousin, Talia. She pretty much ignores Macy whenever Tali is around.


• She thinks Kelly, Brian and Tali live with Grandma Dawn. It's quite hilarious.


• She tries to understand dying. Her Great Grandpa Cecil died and she asks a lot about heaven and God and being sick. It's so hard for a 5 year old to understand.


• Her favorite things are Barbies, Disney girls (Sleeping Beauty, Belle, Ariel, Snow White and Jasmine), and make up - for kids. She likes to play WITH people. Once in awhile she'll play make believe and jump off our rocks and play Peter Pan and Wendy, but she mostly wants to play games, puzzles, or barbies WITH you.


• She is truly a gift from God. She tells people not to litter God's earth and that smoking is very bad. She comments on Dad drinking pop and how unhealthy that is (after she asks for like 5 drinks) and how much she misses her grandmas and friends (still Ethan, who may forever be her best friend...)
  

I'm taking a cue from my cousin Heather's blog and writing down sayings and moments and things about my kids that I notice now. I remember doing this when Caitlin was one in her scrapbook. I looked back the other day and re-read some things I had forgotten! So, Heather, thank you for your blog and reminding me to get going in recording this priceless stuff!

Back then...Caitlin was such a good baby. She got on "the schedule" with virtually no problems. She slept through the night at 2 months, switched from breast milk to regular milk with no fussiness or constipation, and ate like a champ. Her only issues were torticolis (stiff neck) and flat head - all fixed in her first summer with physical therapy and massive tummy time.

At one,

She was walking and laughing and didn't have much fussiness. Texas suited her just fine as we got to play outside A LOT! (and it helped that mommy had 2 days at home every week to play, too)! Some of her recognizable sayings were:

I U! - I love you

Peez - please

Muse - move

Take you - Thank you

Tunes - Turn on the music!

Ope - Open

At two, we had moved to Missouri and were closer to family, which we were all very thankful of...

Caitlin also acquired her first best friend...Ethan.

Caitlin turned three and was still pretty calm. She plays rough and tough, but was a very good three year old (especially when I'd been hearing that the new terrible 2's were 3's)!!!

When she was 3, she liked gymnastics and playing outside with Ethan...EVERYDAY!

When Caitlin turned 4, we had to celebrate it in Pratt, Kansas, our new home. We had moved that previous summer and it was heartbreaking to see her and Ethan apart (not to mention heartbreaking for mom and dad, too, whose close friends were Ethan's parents)! We literally spent everyday talking with them, hanging out in each other's driveways or making dinner for each other.

Caitlin turning 4 was quite a highlight, but not as big of a highlight as her new baby sister, Macy. Caitlin wanted a baby sister and got one. She told everybody (even before we did) that "mommy had a baby in her tummy." She practiced and looked forward to that day.

Caitlin's preschool teachers tell me and send home lots of lists and "what is she doing at school" things. Often they ask the kids what their favorite toys are. Without a second's hesitation, Caitlin ALWAYS says, "my baby sister, Macy." She watches over her, prays for her, and plays with her (most of the time). She is, indeed, her favorite.

Macy's 12 month appointment

My hopes before Macy's 12 month appointment:

• That she would weigh 20 lbs so we could get her in a front facing carseat to hopefully make the car rides a little better
• That her ear infection from 2 weeks ago would be gone
• That the doctor would be impressed with her walking and babbling
• That the doctor would have suggestions for weaning Macy from the bottle to the sippy
• That the doctor would reassure me that her eating habits were normal for a one year old

Actual events at Macy's appointment:

• Macy did not only not break the 20 lb barrier - she LOST a pound...in 2 weeks
• She still had an ear infection
• The doctor suggested a multi-vitamin
• The doctor lectured me on getting up in the middle of the night when she cried and feeding her
• He also informed me that Macy is in charge and I need to change that now while I can
• And then he suggested we set up an appointment with an ENT and talk about tubes...

Four days later...Macy is happy as a clam! She seems to feel great. That first night was rough that I didn't go in and feed her - crying for 2 hours. But, that was that and the next 2 nights she slept through. Wow! That hasn't happened for months! But that's not all. Our little shrinky dink ate peas, chicken AND applesauce the next night! I was beginning to feel very IN CHARGE at this point. She then proceeded to play knock down with her sister (yes, they both love the game where mom blows up the Dora mattress and they bust into each other and fall on the mattress). She walks around the house ba ba ba-ing into a plastic cup strutting her stuff. Maybe at the appointment she heard the doctor declare mommy in charge and started to shape up - Whatever it was - I'm game. Let's keep it up!

It was Caitlin's birthday, too!

Five is monumental! Caitlin has told us that she can now get out of the tub by herself, dry herself off, pour her own juice, and her own milk in her cereal bowl (after serving herself 4 bowls while dad is in the shower!) and get Macy out of her crib (we drew the line at that one).

Caitlin decided she wanted a jungle party. Grandma Dawn did a lot of the planning and researching. Mom, Nancy and I stayed up late Friday night organizing the many different activities we would play at the party: Goin' On a Lion Hunt, Monkey Monkey Lion, Search for the Animals Safari, etc. We had it all planned out. Face painting as they walk in the door. It was going to be great! Now, if only the kids would've cooperated. Once they got there, some got their face painted and that's about all that happened on the agenda. Once they entered the gym, all they wanted to do was run around crazy and play on teh bleachers and be free! After several attempts at Lion Hunts and failed relays, I glared at my husband standing on the sideline and he came to the rescue with a game of freeze tag. The kids had fun and that's what mattered - but I might opt for taking them all to a movie next year! Ah-Confined space!

Would you be happy with 7th place? Oh yeah.

Crapis. (My new word for crap). The season is over. Jon wanted me to keep the kids up last night so he could see them and hopefully they would bring a shed of brightness to his depressed state. They did, but as soon as we put them to bed, he talked and talked and talked about the game. The refs did this, they called this bogus foul, should he have put in a different kid that would've done something different, if only they wouldn't have fouled this shot or the travel hadn't been called and the ensuing made 3 pointer would've counted. I told him we are going to have this kind of game EVERY year until he wins the national championship. I don't know how to insert a smiley face on a blog. My expert bloggers (Heather, Holly, and Kelly - who, if I figure out how to add their blogs to a "Blogs I follow" section, you will see, they truly are experts and their blogs are WAY cuter and better and cooler than mine, so just don't go to theirs, okay? Again, I'd like to insert a smiley face, here) will have to inform me about cool blog stuff like that. Another thing, I may Bloglift (you know, like shoplift, but with a blog) any cool stuff or lists they have because I think they're neat and I want it on my blog - I'm sure they won't mind. Anyways, back to the season.

The Spires had a great year. Jon told his players how instrumental they were and the major part they played in turning this program around from a joke to a premiere team in the conference. He thanked them and told them to get some rest before we have them over to the house for an end of the season celebration. He also, however, told them it wasn't a great year, but it was a good year, and that returners would have to get better, stronger, and tougher and come with a winning attitude next year. He told them that getting this far was not enough but that they wanted to win and should have won.

A friend of mine told me I was "Positive Patty," and that's how I'm going to remember this season - positively. So, I'd like to take a look back now, and POSITIVELY reflect on the season (I'll try to minimally repeat what I said in an earlier post):

• Great group of kids. Never in trouble and super polite. They always talk to my kids and give them high fives. They are extremely nice to me and often give me hugs after the game and make me feel important and like I had something to do with it.
• An example of the type of kid he had: At their first game of the year against a higher division team, a kid came out of the game and sat on the bench. I hollered, "Good job, Pete!" He turned around and said, "Thanks!" It was so cute. My cousin, Emily and I just laughed and I told her I would wait until after the season to tell Jon. My opposite, Jon, would have said that's why he wasn't tough enough, or something like that, I can hear it now.
• Jon only got 2 technicals this year. I was bummed because I didn't see either of them. I did hear plenty of expletives and saw him throw his jacket across the sideline last weekend. Yes, that's a positive - it shakes up the game and adds excitement.
• They were 19-11, which is about .633. Not bad. Jon really wanted to get to 20, and who wouldn't, it's like the pivotal number of wins in college basketball. But, I'm going to go for the positive and it was a heck of a lot more than they won last year (although he hates hearing that).
• Good for the kids. Those kids didn't suck last year. He had a lot of the same kids and 3 of them started, so they didn't suck. I think that's a reflection of them and Jon and I hope they all feel proud of that.
• Jon had player of the year, newcomer of the year, 1st team all conference, and honorable mention 1st team all conference players - heck of a group
• 2nd place. In preseason, the team was picked to finish 7th. I asked him at that time if he'd be happy with 7th. He said, "Oh yeah." I smiled and thought, right. Uh huh. I TOTALLY believe you, and if I do, I obviously haven't been married to you for 7 years. And, as predicted, I reminded him of that conversation. You can all guess what he said, "Its not first." Beautiful.
• We had fun. Games were fun. Caitlin had a blast. She loved telling people her daddy was the coach. Jon was home more than he had been in several years. The players weren't jerks and they listened.
• We'll remember his first year for a long time...probably forever.

Do like him, be like him, remember him...

My Grandpa Cecil passed away on February 9th of this year. He was the greatest man I've ever known. Caitlin said just this morning, I sure wish those flowers (from Grandpa's funeral that Grandma had us each take) were doing better because I love Grandpa Cecil and I wish he was still here. Oh man, so do I...so do I.

Everyday goes by and I think, I know he is not hurting in heaven and heaven is so great. It's the greatest place ever. He is so happy, so I should be, too. Then I think of all of the things that I'll miss and that my 2 girls will miss and I am so sad.

I feel so selfish and then I try to think of all the things he gave us and everything I learned from him. I told Caitlin a couple weeks ago that we could try to do things like he did to remember him and I told her how he NEVER told me just a minute or give me a second. He NEVER EVER told me to choose another game or that he'd rather play something else. In fact, last summer, at Mark and Sheila's, I recall Caitlin and Grace calling Grandpa Cecil's name because he was looking for them and playing hide and seek! Now, in true child-like form, Caitlin constantly reminds me to do it like Grandpa Cecil and stop telling her to wait a minute. I smile and think Grandpa Cecil would be smiling and laughing at that moment, like so many smiles and laughs we shared.

As my sister and cousins and I have shared over the past few weeks, we were truly blessed. My cousin told me her husband was trying to explain to his work the kind of relationship she had with Grandpa Cecil and he explained it's not like a lot of people's. He is so right. Grandpa Cecil is Grandpa Cecil. He's unlike any other. He loved in a day more than most people do in a lifetime. I do believe he fought his cancer for as long as he did for all of us.

I learned so many things from him, and so many things from the days my family spent celebrating his life that week of February 9th.

• My family loves each other so much. Jon was unable to come back to Iowa and I know no matter how much I try that I can never fully explain to him the closeness and love that filled my heart with my family those days. No one was alone. From the moment we got there, we all stayed close and together. We clung onto shoulders, waists, and hands. Hands. That's what my Grandpa would've done - held your hand. He held everybody's hand and I want to pass that on because it was so him and I want him to keep going. We shared so many stories and so many tears. We talked of him often and just went up to each other and hugged, or held hands, or talked. We never left my Grandma alone, and Grandpa knew that. During his last weeks when we went to see him, we all told him that and he knew that with all of his heart...even before we told him.


• All of my family needs each other and needs to talk. My cousins', their wife and husbands, my sister, her husband, all of us went to each other at every moment and just hugged, linked arms, talked or cried on shoulders. And I love them everyday. At the cemetery, my cousin put her hands on grandma's shoulders and I put my hand on her shoulder, too, and made sure to link fingers with Heather...because we need each other.


• I am the big sister. I am. Kelly said it that day and I hugged her when she was afraid to go on knowing he was gone. I talked to her on the phone a lot and I said to Grandpa what was in her heart and I knew she couldn't say. And I love her everyday.


• We know now how to do things to make people feel better. With each bouquet of flowers, cards and thoughts, I told myself I will ALWAYS send something or call or do anything for those who are hurting so bad. So many times we think it might make them feel worse or it might be uncomfortable, but even a text letting you know how sorry means the world.


• I should not have tried to live up to Grandpa's memory in my speech about him. I tried so hard to come up with the perfect speech and explain to everyone the thoughts and feelings we all had for him and he for us. I knew I couldn't do it, and I didn't. But I also know whatever I said would be said from my heart and it didn't matter if I didn't read what was on my paper or that my words were jumbled. As my mom once said, "You could do no wrong in your Grandpa's eyes." And I love my mom everyday.


• We love our family. My grandma's sister Grace said to me during the visitation, "You kids are so good to your grandparents and to each other." We love each other. I talk to my cousins because I love them and they help me. We don't call for idle reasons - we talk because we need to vent, or we need advice, or we're checking to see how we are all doing. I talk to them more than people talk to their own sisters, and that's how I see them. And I love them everyday.


• I need to talk about my dad more. Holly and I talked about that and how back when he died, people didn't talk much about it. I love talking about Grandpa Cecil because I want to share him with everyone. As we left the cemetary, Kelly and Brian and my mom went to my dad's place by Grandpa, and I went over there as Kelly and Brian got in the car. Mom and I put our arms around each other and told me the same thing she told Grandma Phyllis - two angels in heaven watching over us now. And I love both of them.


• Call your grandparents. I have almost always lived most of my adult life a ways from all of my grandparents. Grandma Phyllis sent a thank you for Christmas this year talking so much about mostly, her thanks to my phone calls and how each call one of us kids made brightened up Grandpa's day - and this last year he had so many hard days. So I'm going to call all of my grandparents more - it brightens up my days, too! And I love all of them.

Good-bye, Grandpa. I will take care of my kids like you asked and I will try everyday to do like you and play and laugh and smile and enjoy every single minute. I will remind myself and anybody else about needing a dose of Grandpa Cecil...we will all be the better for it. Thank you for taking care of us. I love you.